Round 18 Preview

 Last Week           5/9           Season Total      97/144

It was a crazy week on the field, as it was off the field.  Saturday was almost a total bust as far as tipping was concerned and there was much debate about umpire contact and the penalties that should be dished out.  In most of the things I read, the desired sanction was anywhere between 6 weeks and public execution by being broken on the wheel, but what everyone forgot was that there is a system in place to deal with things like this.  It’s not a perfect system and it often puts forth confusing and unwanted outcomes, but it is the system we have.

Of course, as we have just witnessed in the World Cup, there’s nothing stopping either Donald Trump or Anthony Albanese in calling up and getting the decision overturned.  Being able to stand on that dais and say, “remember that time I got a Collingwood player suspended?” is probably a pretty good way to get a boost in the polls to be honest.

Outside of footy there is Wimbledon, the World Cup, an LPGA Major and Le Tour de France to be consumed amongst any other minor sports that tickle your fancy.

And I may have had a win with Kayo.  I have the ombudsmen looking into them.  But I’ll deal with that later.  I’m off to bask in the Sun.

Fremantle vs Sydney     Perth Stadium   Thursday Night

That’s it, the dream is over.  Fremantle will capitulate from here.  At least that’s what Freo supporters are desperately trying to keep out of their thoughts.  It’s a great opportunity for Sydney to turn up the heat.  But they can always rely on Wharfie Time.  Cox played on Longmuir many times, I wonder how they will go coaching against each other.  Fremantle by 12 points.

Collingwood vs North Melbourne           Marvel Stadium               Friday Night

I’m not sure if smashing Maynard to the ground is a good way to try and put him off his game.  It certainly didn’t appear to help.  A good win by the Magpies away from the safety of the MCG and here is another long travel for them.  North Melbourne will be buoyed by the fact they stitched up Collingwood in the pre-season and maybe have the right recipe.  They haven’t beaten Collingwood for a while.  Are they due?  I’ll stick with momentum for now.  Collingwood by 11 points.

St Kilda vs Port Adelaide              Marvel Stadium               Saturday Afternoon

The Power had the energy to win last week, but this week they come up against The Saints who are coming off the Essendon bye.  I think this should be a good game to watch as Butters gets to sample some more Melbourne lifestyle.  Saint Kilda by 21 points.

GWS vs Geelong              Showgrounds    Saturday Afternoon

It was the Giants that were able to crack the code to beating Fremantle this year.  The trick is to put them in cryo-stasis by playing them in Canberra.  Geelong meanwhile had a rare loss at home and are looking a bit out of sorts.  They’ve gone with the old saying, “a one-armed Jeremy Cameron is better than no Jeremy Cameron” but I’m not sure its working.  GWS by 11 points.

Carlton vs Hawthorn      MCG      Saturday Night

Here we go Carlton.  This is the real test.  If Fraser can win this one, look out!  There will be an instant call for a by-election in the seat of Grayndler to see if we can’t install Fraser as Prime Minister.  Better yet, he might get poached to sort out the whole Russia/Ukraine mess or oust Trump or be called to coach the Hyena’s to victory over the Lions on the plains of Africa.  I’m not one to rush into statues or commemorative currency but seeing Fraser’s face on a new and useful $8 note (signifying the 8^th victory) wouldn’t be out of the question.  Hawthorn will be desperate after a poor showing in their home away from home last week, but Carlton has true momentum.  Sadly, for Fraser, I think the fairytale will be over and he will receive a blemish on his perfect scorecard.  They didn’t live happily ever after, but they did all live.  Hawthorn by 28 points.

Adelaide vs Gold Coast Adelaide Oval   Saturday Night

While the Crows got the job done last week, it was less than convincing.  Gold Coast went the biff and paid the price.  Given Gold Coast have never won at Adelaide Oval I’ll assume they don’t know how.   Adelaide by 26 points.

Footscray vs West Coast               Marvel Stadium               Sunday Afternoon

I’ll admire West Coasts heart.  While not getting so many wins, they are definitely improving.  I just hope their fans can maintain their patience.  Footscray return from that horrible road trip up to Sydney.  Footscray by 34 points.

Melbourne vs Richmond              MCG      Sunday Afternoon

What can I say about Melbourne.  I already said they can’t win on the road.  I was wrong.  They destroyed Hawthorn and the main architect was Gawn.  Well, the architect was King, Gawn was the tool.  Not ‘tool’ as in the derogatory term for a foolish, obnoxious or arrogant person, but ‘tool’ as in instrument used to complete a job safely and without issue.  Which clears the way for me to mention that Gawn is a massive tool and will also safely complete the job against Richmond without issue.  The Tigers were gallant in defeat last week but still ache for a win.  Not here though.  Melbourne by 36 points.

Brisbane vs Essendon    Gabba   Sunday Afternoon

It was an ominous display by Brisbane last week.  This game will be no spectacle unless you’re some kind of sadist.  Or, in the case of an Essendon supporter, a masochist (everyone is some kind of ist).  For Essendon, it’s all about Hird.  Given the likelihood of him coaching is about 103% the rest of us need to start to consider some lockdown protocols until we can all establish Hird immunity.  Brisbane by 83 points.