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Round 2 Preview

  Last Week           6/9           Season Total      9/14 The world just isn’t improving.   It turns out that being an Australian doesn’t mean you help out a mate in their time of need.   Instead, being Australian means, you become a selfish fuel hoarding panic merchant.   Where did we go so wrong?   Preaching Over. It was good to see all the teams playing this weekend.   The controversy over Opening Round continues.   The additional imbalance in the game that no-one wants and no-one needs.   The fact they scheduled a match in Melbourne really topped it.   That’s the nail in the coffin really.   That’s the point where you question the goals of the board.   They’re not isolating the Northern States anymore to promote and grow.   They’re grabbing cash.   I don’t blame them.   Securing your bo...

Round 1 Preview

  Last Week           3/5           Season Total      3/5 The first week (or is it the zeroth week?) of footy has been played.  The ladder is already taking shape, albeit in the shape of a lop-sided elephant with only 2 legs and a small human-like nose. Interestingly, I put those parameters into an AI image generator, and it came back with a picture of the AFL Ladder!  Meanwhile, the CEO of the Board of Peace has started a war which makes me think someone should check the pre-requisites for that position.  Fuel prices are sky-rocketing and so people are getting in fights at petrol stations and the ability to buy a jerrycan is severely diminished.  Toilet paper is still available… for now.  If you’ve got an electric car, you’re safe until the AI chips inside them start crashing them into petrol stations to make life even harder for t...

Round 0/Opening Round Preview 2026

  Last Week           0/0          Season Total      0/0   It’s official, the world has gone to the crapper.   Luckily, we can all choose a simple life and just watch the footy, which has returned this week after its annual hiatus.   I trust you were able to have a good off-season and catch up with family to the point that they’ve had enough of you and will leave you alone for the following 20-something weeks.   I say “20-something” as I really don’t know how long the season is anymore.   Firstly, we start counting at zero, I think, then some teams don’t start at zero and it seems like those teams only get one bye.   And now there’s some kind of wildcard round in play for some teams and so it all gets a bit confusing.   I feel like the following may be true:   Number of matches in a season played by any one team is equal...

2026 Pre-Season Analysis

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I was flat out trying to work out how I can bequeath my meagre wealth to Collingwood (luckily they provided me with a step by step guide) because I’m pretty sure that in the current economic climate it would be of no use to any of my dear family, when I had the sudden realization that the season starts in less than two weeks! I tried to enjoy the T20 World Cup, but it turns out the Australian Team have the skill of a sack of potatoes, and I found the Winter Olympics frustrating to watch.   Given the time of night it is on, I am consigned to watching the highlights.   I find it frustrating that Channel 9 doesn’t recognise that any other countries exist.   I can enjoy watching Australia, but when you get to see them crash out into last place and they don’t show you a world record setting run, I get annoyed. A highlight though was the State of Origin.   It was a well received, well supported contest and we look forward to another installment next year.   A tick...

2026 State of Origin Preview

Thank goodness for State of Origin Footy.   It rescues us from the sports wasteland of February between the end of Test Cricket and the start of the footy season proper.   There’s only so many Elvis movies one can consume.   Ok, it’s maybe not that bad with cricket tragics getting the T20 World Cup to revel in, but for me at least that’s just glorified backyard cricket.   I see a future where one hand one bounce is added to the rules and 6 and out will be a thing with batters being forced into the shame of retrieving the ball from Mrs. Gattley’s Rose bushes.   Of course, there is also the Winter Olympics which we’re currently in the midst of.   Where you can get your fill of sports like Curling, Skeleton and Ski-jumping which has had some recent controversy with competitors injecting a form of acid into their penises to make them bigger.   Allegedly it gives some kind of aerodynamic advantage…I’m guessing it’s something like Australia II and the secr...